50 Reasons to Watch UB-Miami instead of the Presidential Election

“Don’t Blame Me, I voted for the Other Guy”

50.  The game will be over by 11, the election coverage may go weeks…..remember 2000?

49.  McCain’s teeth are scary

48.  Do Democrats really want to be crestfallen again?

47.  Drew Willy is one of the best QBs in the nation that you don’t know.

46.  All UB games come down to the 4th quarter.

45.  Turner Gill, watch him before he goes to a “real” school.

44.  The polls close at 6pm or 7pm on the east coast.  Kickoff is at 7:30!

43.  From UB’s website:  Both teams will accentuate the Red vs. Blue political theme of the day as the Bulls will be in all blue uniforms and the RedHawks of Miami will be in all red. The teams got an NCAA exemption to do so. 

THEY GOT AN EXEMPTION FROM THE NCAA PEOPLE!  WHAT MORE DO YOU NEED?

42.  Odds are none of these players are getting paid to play college football.  What’s more American than that?

41.  America is in a recession, we need some mindless entertainment to take our brains away from real issues.

40.  Barack Obama is a Communist, or a Socialist, or a Marxist.  Where is Joe McCarthy when you need him?

39.  100% less Sarah Palin clips and sound bites.

38.  No Joe Biden to talk about his train rides to work.

37.  I think Rob Stone will be there!  Ladies are you paying attention?

 

36.  You need to find out the under/over on how many times they mention “Buffalo Wings.”  I’ll set the line at 5.

35.  James “Big Game” Starks.  The Buffalo running back has 700 yards on the ground so far this season.

34.  From the UB website:   In honor of a great Buffalonian on Election night, UB will honor one of the great voices in political journalism, the late Tim Russert with a video montage, while his sister Kathy Russert Hughes and daughter Ashley will serve as honorary captains for the coin toss. In addition, Tim’s son Luke Russert will have a video welcome prior to the game.  

If you say you don’t like Tim Russert, you are decidedly UN-American.

33.  Miami placekicker Nate Parseghian is a relative of Ara Parseghian of Notre Dame fame.

32.  Buffalo lost a heartbreaker at Miami last season, which led to a MAC East Championship for them.  Sadly for me, I was at that game, sitting with…….

31.  UB wide out NaamanRoosevelt’s parents.  Excellent parents to a great student-athlete.  Roosevelt has put up big numbers and I expect an 8 catch game with 105 yards and a TD from him.

30.  Miami is known as “the cradle of coaches.”  That has to count for something right?

Former coaches include:  Earl Blaik, Weeb Ewbank, Ara Parseghian, Paul Brown, Woody Hayes, Jim Tressel, Bill Arnsparger, Sid Gilman, Bo Schembechler, John Pont, Bill Mallory, Ron Zook, Randy Walker, John Harbaugh and Terry Hoeppner have all spent time there.

29.  Miami’s campus is one of the nicest public schools I have ever seen.  Which counts for nothing I guess.

28.  Who knows, you might see snow.

27.  The spread is 8.5 and you just know UB won’t cover.

26.  UB’s campus is the ugliest in the country, I can’t wait to see the views of campus.  How many times will they show the on campus trailers?

See the trailers

25.  The stands will be empty, so someone has to watch.

24. Decidedly less Mavericks. 

23.  UB had two more players drafted this past year than Alabama.  Who is the next NFL star?

22.  100% William Ayers free zone.

21.  Barack’s got this shit on lock son!

20.  You want to miss this?

19.  How can you decide between Katie Couric, Brian Williams and Charlie Gibson?  You can’t!

18.  CNN correspondent Wolf Blitzer went to UB.  He wants you to flip back and forth at the very least.

17.  Last year’s freshman All-American Davonte Shannon plays for UB.

16.  I might move to Canada if McCain is elected, which is only miles from the UB campus.  It might be wise for the Canadians to take up air time highlighting their country’s benefits…..favorable exchange rate, nudie bars, and free health care.

15.  UB is the best college football team in New York state.

14.  How many times will the ESPN JV announcing squad mistakenly call the University AT Buffalo, the University OF Buffalo.  I bet 100.

13.  UB is 4-4 and could still win the MAC.

12.  ITS MAC FOOTBALL, COME ON PEOPLE!

11.  The only other time in UB’s history where they were fighting for a Bowl game was in 1958 when they won the Lambert Cup and then refused to play in the Tangerine Bowl because their black players would not be allowed to participate in the game due to the color of their skin!  Now there’s an inspirational script someone should green light. 

10.  Therefore, watch the game for Barack Obama, Willie Evans, and Mike Wilson.  Just click the link above.

9.  If you live in New York, you know its going “Blue” anyway.

8.  From the UB website:  There will be spirit wavers (a new version of the popular thundersticks) with the Bulls’ logo given to the first 2,500 fans through the gates. The first 1,000 students at the game will be given rally towels.  

Can you actually miss seeing “spirit wavers……” AND AND rally towels?

7.  From the UB website:  Popular Channel 2 personality Kevin O’Neill will bring sideline reports throughout the game on the videoboard on Election Night results as they happen. 

Ummmm, UB is pulling out all the stops if they have a local celebrity at the game!

6.  You are going to pay more taxes regardless of who you vote for.

5.  You won’t have to get into an argument about same sex marriage or abortion if you watch the game.

4.  Ohio may go “Red” and we all know New York is better than Ohio.

3.  Quick, where is Labatt’s American headquarters located?

2.  Significantly less voter fraud involved.

1.  UB wins by 3 and goes 5-4.

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