LWN’s SUPER CRAZY NFL DRAFT PREVIEW

I hope that the NFL will learn something from Freddie Prinze Jr’s career.  Remember when you couldn’t go five minutes without seeing a teen flick staring the actor of Puerto Rican, German, Jewish and Italian descent.  He was everywhere; he had roles in I Know What You Did Last Summer, AND I Know What You Did Last Summer 2.  He starred in She’s All That, for Christ sakes and was a mischievous Jessica Biel- loving stud in Summer Catch.

NFL Draft: Top 10 and Bottom 10

MY TOP 10 PLAYERS

Granted and admittedly, this is opinion.  My top ten is not based on the all the crap other analysts look at.  Guarantee I have studied all these players as much as possible with the information that is available to non-media types. 

1.  Glen Dorsey- This guy has all the tools to make it happen.  He was the consensus number 1 five months ago, but has slipped due to durability concerns.  He goes 6′2″ 300 pounds and is a terror.  He has a full trophy case to prove his worth and has motor running on high RPM’s probably because he was bow-legged as a kid.  Passing on him is a mistake.  Warren Sapp was about as tall, his career was pretty good.

2.  Darren McFadden- It’s very conflicting internally to put him as two, but I can’t deny his ability.  He can run, catch, throw and has played the odd QB hybrid position we have all tinkered with when playing Madden.  BUT HE HAS DONE IT IN REAL LIFE.  Anyone catch the LSU game this year?  I am scared to put him at 2, but Reggie Bush with more tangible ability is hard to fault.

3.  Jake Long- Anyone drafting for need would be smart to look at Long.  He allowed only two sacks in his college career and only two penalties in his college career.  That’s insanity.  He’s also not throwing money around, he has not taking very much money from his agent which is a good sign for future employers.

4.  Aquib Talib- If I had more time earlier in the year, I would have sung this guy’s praises to the masses.  I almost laughed when the first draft previews had him somewhere in the second round.  People questioned his speed and said his athletic ability was his only asset in college.  It’s hard to deny that a guy who is taller than probably 2/3’s of NFL cornerbacks and runs a 4.47 is slow.  I think this guy is a prototype for the future of NFL CB’s.  If the trend is taller wide outs in the NFL, then the corners will need to get bigger too.  He has character issues with regard to grass, weed or marryjane, but he’s not quite PacMan Jones.

5.  Vernon Gholston- Five is a great spot for a workout warrior.  That’s Gholston’s calling card.  He ran a 4.68 40, repped the bench 37 times, and was a lead performer in the vertical jump, three cone drill, etc.  He also got a sack against Jake Long (one of the two ever), and could be a true havoc in the 4-3 defense as a pass rusher. 

6.  Keith RIvers- This USC bro has played everywhere in his college career.  He reads well as a linebacker (primary spot), runs well enough to be a safety in certain situations, and has the strength to rush the passer at defensive end.  In the NFL he is a weak side linebacker, but don’t discount his ability to drop back in pass coverage or come screaming off the end.

7.  Ryan Clady- The Boise State OT doesn’t have anything else to prove in my mind.  He played against top-flight competition as a Bronco.  He is an athletic 314 pound man and gets his hands on the defender before they have the chance.  Any good NFL trainer will get him to about 325 without losing any of his speed.  With pass rushers getting smaller and faster, Clady is the future.

8.  Chris Long- The son of Howie has the measurables.  He is a prototypical pass rusher with seemingly all the tools.  He’ll fit in well with most teams, but is not a top 5 pick in most drafts.

9.  Leodis McKelvin- A kick returner who runs the 40 in 4.38, and developed into a good corner is not that easy to find.  Imagine Devin Hester, if he could play corner in the NFL.  He might be Troy’s next big thing in the NFL.

10.  Rashard Mendenhall- This Illinois running back amassed 1999 all purpose yards this past season.  He also had 17 tds.  He can run, he can catch.  He led Illinois to the Rose Bowl this season.  Enough said. 

Other Notables:  James Hardy, Joe Flaco, Ali Highsmith, Brandon Flowers, Dan Connor, Chris Johnson, Felix Jones, Tashard Choice

TOP 10 POTENTIAL BUSTS

1.  Matthew Ryan- He oozes Alex Smith NFL potential.  He throws an accurate ball but 19 INTs last season have me worried.  Plus, he did not improve from Junior to senior year.  His stats remained almost stagnant.  He did attempt more passes, but his arm doesn’t have the zip it should.  His passer rating did not improve and he turned it over more.  I don’t see why he is the number one QB in the draft.  I would put him behind Brian Brohm (NFL ready), Joe Flaco (strong arm), Andre Woodson (accuracy), and maybe even Chad Henne and Dennis Dixon.

2.  Phillip Merling- No doubt teams will be attracted to his size 6′5″, but he’s only 272.  The Clemson staff begged him to stay put but the allure of being drafted top 20 was too alluring.  He can be good, but buyers beware.

3.  DeSean Jackson- Sure he can fly (4.35 40), but he is listed generously at 6′0, 178.  He is going to get punished at the pro level and has a history of injuries.  He can’t block and must be placed in the slot only to be effective.  He also was inactive for some games due to academic issues, including Cal’s bowl game this year.

4.  Sedrick Ellis- He is shorter and fatter than Dorsey and I don’t think he can make it.  My prediction is that he balloons after being drafted and there are problems getting him into camp due to contract issues.  It will be a headache for whoever signs him.  People that represent USC players have a history of this.

5.  Mario Manningham- He has tons of qualities, but lies about pot use.  Once again, not a really tall guy and he is not overly physical.  He’s not really fast either, don’t was a pick on him.

6.  Dominique Rodgers-Cromartie- Maybe I am wrong, but he doesn’t have Talib’s qualities and has played against no one.  Can someone explain why since he is a good track athlete and his cousin had a good NFL season he is a potential top 15 pick?

7.  Devin Thomas-  He has had one productive season in college football.  Charles Rodgers anyone?

8.  Jerod Mayo- He might be my Patrick Willis from last year.  He has a ton of potential but doesn’t like being hit.  Often he goes for the big shoulder hit instead of wrapping up.  He has trouble getting off the block too.  This is not good news.

9.  Jeff Otah- Too big, too little experience.

10.  Malcolm Kelly- When was the last time someone failed to impress at their pro day when they had nowhere to go but up?  Kelly is huge, and should be good but he blamed conditions at Oklahoma for a subpar pro day.  Huh, what?

Chris Henry Has Reached Legendary Status

*Note-  I have used this picture before

I love this photo because it is a mug shot of Chris Henry after he was arrested for brandishing a gun outside of an Orlando hotspot while wearing his own jersey.  Is there any other athlete that should be a first ballot arrest of the week hall of famer?  Readers, submit your opinions.

Henry’s stats:

December 2005-  Marijuana possession

January 2006-  The gun possession outside da club

June 2006-  Drunk driving and speeding

June 2006-  Giving minors booze in a hotel room

Then a couple ticky tack offenses; driving with expired plates, then driving with an expired license.

Now, most recently AFTER an 8-game suspension in 2007, Henry got into a fight with an 18-year-old then smashed his back window in with a beer bottle.  What in the name of Lawrence Phillips is going on with this guy?

 

From LWN’s 2006 archive:

4. Arrest of the week- Lawrence Phillips

Former NFL running back Lawrence Phillips, who was wanted by police for domestic violence, was arrested Sunday after allegedly running the car he was driving into three teenagers who argued with him during a pickup football game, police said. Word.

**Notes**
The car he was driving was stolen
He was already wanted for choking his girlfriend, so he did the obvious thing- play pick up football with some HS kids, then try to kill them.

Crean Gets The Green

 While I am not usually as negative as other IU alumni on this website, I must say my gripes about IU generally are directed toward the athletic office.  Their usual mismanagement of Human Resources related issues must be some ploy to make sure their name gets on Sports Center in the hope that it will lead to a surge of new applications to the school because the first rule of marketing is, “any publicity is good publicity” after all.   

Dirtbag Vampire is Coming!!!!

THE WAIT IS ALMOST OVER!!!

Smokey McTrees will be releasing his first EP mini-length Dirtbag Vampire on 5/20/08.

5 Brand-New tracks begging to make your head bob and your muscles jiggle.

Available from Smokeymctrees.com for 5 bucks.

If you wanna say “fuck it” to the art and packaging downloads will be available soon for a buck a song!

Or if you’re even cheaper and have a sense of humor, enter the Smokey McTrees.com Dirtbag Vampire contest and win a free copy of the cd!!!! The rules are simple. All you have to do is:

Answer Five Questions. Post your answers in the comments box. Smokey and Thrilho will pick the funniest answers from the lot, and the top three answers will get a free Dirtbag Vampire cd. The top answer that makes us piss our pants the most will earn the winner a free Smokey T-Shirt! Remember, you will not be judged on whether you are right or wrong. You will be judged on how much you make us laugh our asses off.

Ok, Here We GO!

1. What are four things that rhyme with the words Barack Hussein?

2. What would you get if you crossed Christopher Walken with Wanda Sykes?

3. What has four legs and sniffs butts?

4. Perez Hilton prefers ______ over braces?

5. What would happen if Manny Ramirez and Gilbert Arenas switched medications? Tell us why.

Ok, so the questions aren’t that funny. So make them funny, and win a CD. Hell, Smokey will sign it. He might even skeet on it, if you wish!

This contest is sole property of 2008 SmokeyMcTrees.Com. All Rights Reserved